You Want It Darker?


If you are the dealer, I’m out of the game. If you are the healer, it means I’m broken and lame. If thine is the glory then mine must be the shame. You want it darker? We kill the flame. – Leonard Cohen 

The transmutation of energy creates the world and destroys it in the same breath.  It is Brahma, Vishnu and Shiva all in perpetual ascendance.  It is your life force and your decomposing corpse; it dances on its own grave.

Victories form the nadir from which we descend into crushing defeat.

The warmth of companionship is the ambience of the waiting room where we bide our time in anticipation of a lonesome, solitary death.  Together we die alone, in fear that we’ve feared the wrong things all along.  But at least that’s all there is to fear.

Today I work and write and take in transmissions from our planetary Babylon.  I think I understand it all because I understand nothing.  I think it’s all real out there, these dispatches from the four corners alerting me of recent events whose veracity I never question.  I am the one behind these transmissions, after all, and if I can’t trust myself…

I cloak myself in idealism.  I don’t even understand the things I think about, but I will make sure they are doubly incomprehensible in their expression.  Seven billion voices declare their ideals and each one gets lost in the cacophony.  We create a silence like thunder and take pride in our infinitesimal contribution to the well-oiled chaos.

No one leaves a legacy behind.  The dead do not come back.

Those who suffer do so for eternity, as do those who smile.  We all smile through our suffering and suffer through our smiles.  No one can decide which is worse, because in truth, there is no difference.

Come in, further, and explore this dark cave with impersonal curiosity.  It sure as hell doesn’t care about you, so why do you grant it so much respect?  Sure as the sun will rise again, so will you.  As it shall set again, so shall you.  It is a rhythm set in motion long ago and again each moment; you are powerless to bow out of the dance.

Do you want to die?  Go right ahead, but there is no escape.  Do you want to live?  Life is not apart from death. No portion of an arc can be removed from a circle.

Whisper or scream, tremble or dream, the energy will return to its source just as surely as its source will release it anew into the phenomenal realm of illusion.

We are already dead.  What’s left to fear?  When you arrive at black’s deepest shade, you no longer need to adjust your eyes to the light.



17 thoughts on “You Want It Darker?

  1. For all my self-proclaimed cynicism I still have trouble wrapping my head around “If we’re going to die we might as well live”. As much as I’d love to look for the good in life all I ever seem to find is the bad. I guess everyone sees things differently though.
    My own personal hangups aside this is quite the piece. Some of these lines would make fantastic quotes.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks! Sometimes if you look very intently at the bad from differing angles, you’ll find that’s where the good resides. Though the fact that we all continually see things through the filter of good and bad is the problem in and of itself.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Ah yes, now there’s a problem I REALLY have trouble wrapping my head around. I do think I’ve been making some progress though, much to the chagrin of everyone around me! I’ve been making efforts not to take things so seriously (an oxymoron, I know) and I think it has been paying off, so thank you for that 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  2. I love how we all rise and fall together simultaneously like one giant perfect mess, everyone playing their part, doing their individual thing…put us all together and it is like a beautiful dance. There is no light without dark, nor dark without light. Put another way, there is nothing in the dark that isn’t there in the light.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Wow this was intense Paul. Although I had a tough time wrapping my head around several of the juxtaposed paradoxes, you grabbed me with the invitation: “Come in, further, explore this dark cave with impersonal curiosity.”

    Liked by 1 person

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